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Old 04-09-2010, 01:16 PM   #1
melfab15
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Default Interesting turn of events

So after using the last of our frozen embires in Dec-Jan, we had decided that we were done with fertility treatments and that we would just try naturally until ben turns 2 and then if we were still not PG that we would look into adoption.

Well the other day our RE called and wanted to check in with us and see how we were doing. He went on to tell us of a trial that is going on right now incase we were interested. (I am not nervous about the trial, that is how we got Ben). He then also went on to say that he would like to waive all his personal fees and drug fees. So instead of 10,000 to do IVF it would only cost us 3-5,000. This is an incredible offer and one I am not sure if we can pass up but I have some concerns . . .

1. What if I MC again? Can I really go through my 4th MC? That just might break me.

2. What if it doesnt work like last time? That was really hard and left me broken for awhile.

3. What if we get twins? DH REALLY does not want twins?

4. What if we get tons of embryos (last time we did IVF we got 10) and I had REALLY bad OHSS. We can only put in 2. So we are back to the issue of paying to freeze embryos that we wont use if the treatment works.


ARGHHH. . .. just when I was getting used to the idea that IVF was not an option for us. What should i do?
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Old 04-09-2010, 01:51 PM   #2
chinookpilotswife
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That is a tough decision...if it were me I would go for it. I think you would always wonder 'what if' if you don't try. I know going through everything all over again would be hard and stressing about not knowing what the outcome could be but what if this is God's way of giving you another chance. What if this is how He wants you to have another child? Just my opinion I will pray for you and your DH...I know it is not an easy decision!
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Old 04-09-2010, 01:57 PM   #3
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Wow-what a neat 'opportunity' that has been placed in front of you! I too continue to pray God will let you know how he wants you and DH to proceed.

I'll just throw this out there that there are agencies out there that take and 'adopt' your frozen embryos to couples who cannot have children. And from the one I consider using for ours, they let you have as little or as much contact as you desire. So-that is just how I'm now dealing with remaining 6! lol.

But Meghan is right-what if is is how He wants you to have more children?

Keeping you in prayer about this.
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Old 04-09-2010, 02:06 PM   #4
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oh mel....that is such a tough decision!! I would say go for it too, also because you would always wonder what if, and regret not trying. But as you said, you had just started getting closure to the whole process, so it is a very personal decision for you and Dh, and if I were in your shoes, I don't know if I could say so easily what I would do either.
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Old 04-09-2010, 02:20 PM   #5
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Mel- Keep praying about it. Maybe this is God's way of telling you to keep trying. That's such a tough decision. I will be praying for you both to make the right decision. I'm so excited for you that you have this opportunity. When do you have to decide?
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Old 04-09-2010, 03:08 PM   #6
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wow Mel, what an opportunity. I can't help but think it is a sign...you conceived Ben on a trial too. It's definitely something to pray about. How long do you have to make a decision?
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Old 04-09-2010, 03:27 PM   #7
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Mel- Tough decision, will be praying for you, but its hard not to say go for it, so I did!
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Old 04-09-2010, 03:33 PM   #8
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Mel -- this is a very personal and tough decision... but I agree that it may be the answer God is sending you... I know that you have prayed a lot for a second baby, maybe this is His way of saying "OK, here it is!". Will be praying for you
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Old 04-09-2010, 04:15 PM   #9
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I know it is hard decision for you and dh, but I would say absolutely yes! So many wierd things happened to me the last 10 days that I thought were "signs", but didn't want to "give in" in fear of being disappointed. I truely believe this is a "sign" that came to you for a reason. Not many people get personal phone calls from REs offering free services.

Would your dh be more satisfied with just 1 rather than possibly 3???

Let us know what you decide...good luck friend!!!
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Old 04-09-2010, 04:43 PM   #10
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Mel, I agree with ladybug. I would say yes and take it as a sign. this doesn't, after all, happen to everyone! But, saying that, I do know that this is a personal decision and a tough one at that. You need to do what is right for you and your family. I will keep you in my prayers...

and as far as twins, if you are blessed with twins, that is what god wants for you. He may not want twins now, but if that were to happen, he would fall in love with both of them once they were born. my dh doesn't want twins either, but if we were blessed with them, he would warm up to the idea pretty quickly.
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